Alex & Sam’s Daily Life – A Pervert at Work, A Pervert at Home

I move my fork around in my chicken and rice lunch bowl, my eyes still focusing on Eliza, “Are you talking about that one guy in his thirties who still wears a mohawk with green hair dye on his tips?”

“No, that’s Derek over on Madison. He’s usually complaining to me about how come he still has to pay repair fees, but he’s actually been quiet as of late. Everything must be fine now if he has no reason to leave me message after message that I refuse to listen to anyways. I have about twelve voice messages I didn’t listen to and at least eight of them are his old messages from months ago.”

“And the other four?”

“Probably David trying to contact me. He gets paranoid every now and then when I don’t text him about making it to work on time. He can be so overprotective sometimes. It’s like he forgot who he’s married to after all these years.”

Every now and then, Eliza likes to bring up her husband, David, during our lunch breaks. She always talks about how he’s always asking how she’s doing at work, or what time she’s coming home. When I first started working here and overheard her telling those stories I was honestly convinced that it was some kind of abusive relationship. Then, when I actually saw David in person at a business holiday party and saw the way he acts, he would be the one being abused based on the way Eliza likes to manhandle him as an act of love. Headlocks, arm punches, and reverse catcalls are just some of the things David has to endure by being married to this crazy woman. I almost feel a bit bad for him, but I know that Eliza’s intentions aren’t malicious. He might even like having somebody who shows their affection in those ways.

Swapping back and forth between our work stuff and personal tales, Eliza and I calmly eat our food. Heather walks into the break room and soon joins in with her own container of homemade sandwiches and a small side soup.

Heather lifts her arms over her head and stretches, letting out a small groan, “I was stuck at my desk all day today. Having to balance two different work loads is pretty hard.”

“What they got you doing today, Cotton Candy?” Eliza asks.

“I have to reach out to a few customers and clients on Ms. Auburn’s behalf as my main priority. But on top of that, she wants me to finish up some work that somebody left behind from yesterday. I don’t even know what the person was doing!”

“What kind of work was the person doing?” I add on.

“Matching up somebody’s payment history with our records for their tax purposes. The thing is, there’s gaps and double payments in both our records and the clients, so I can’t tell where things are labeled as a missed payment, overcharge, or if something just wasn’t labeled correctly.” With surprise in her bright eyes, Heather takes quick glances back and forth between me and Eliza, “How the hell do you two put up with this every day?!”

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