Tag: Humor

Alex & Sam’s Daily Life – Shop and Dash

Nobody wants to look into their fridge and witness an undesired emptiness: no food to eat. A homeowner looking into an empty fridge is like an artist staring at a blank canvas or empty book: something should be there to cover up the empty space. For Samantha, an empty fridge would make it harder for her to create amazing dishes in the kitchen. 

Heading out early in the morning to get some grocery shopping done for a few things, Sam’s trip goes from a simple grab and go, to a mission to sneak around being seen by a specific person. 

Motivated by possibly getting praise and head pats for getting what Alexis asked for, Sam does everything she can to make sure everything ends in her favor. But like usual, she ends up forgetting something. 

Huh, it’s not looking too bad in here. I should still start writing a list of things we need though so I don’t forget.

“Eggs, eggs, eggs… Did I write bread and milk on the list, too?”

Awaiting Enemy

It’s always calm before the storm, silent before the approaching danger. The best way to deal with an arriving enemy is to find tranquility and patience.

Even if the enemy is annoying, a calm mind will always achieve victory.

Sightless, I patiently await for my enemy to approach. Preparing myself, I open the palm of my hand and let it rest on my lap.

My enemy is here…

Alex & Sam’s Daily Life – Daily Routine Delivery

In every relationship, there’s always two sides to everything. One side may focus on keeping the family together at home, while the other goes out to work. In this case, it’s Samantha holding down the fort while Alexis tries not to fall asleep behind the desk.

Even though Sam loves to tease her girlfriend with perverted remarks and gaming jokes, she knows when it’s time to get down to business around the house. That’s if she’s able to overcome the constant desire for laziness and video games.

No matter what though, she still wants to make sure that she provides the three main things she was taught in order to keep her girlfriend happy.

Oh shit, she caught onto something. I need to change the topic before she pries deeper!

With nothing to lose, I dive my hand straight in between her boobs and frantically feel around for one of her nipples, “Let me cop a feel!”

On-Call Sharp Shooter (Part Two)

I swear, I hate when things don’t always go my way. First, I get an assignment that should have taken no more than twenty minutes and the next thing I know, it took me an hour. Thankfully, I was a bit drunk half of the time, but still, it was extra time wasted!

H.R better have some kind of way to repay me for that lost time. I mean, overtime pay would be nice, but it’s not enough! I should see if they can throw in an extra case of beer…

Regardless, I’m sure that once I speak to my boss, everything will be all settled out. She’s a pretty reasonable person who wouldn’t just drop things on me without a heads up, so she should already know that I want something out of this.

“What?!” I yell as I slam the door behind me when entering the room. “The only reason why I even came here was to complain about my last job!”

Yumiko ties her hair into a ponytail as she adjusts her desk chair, “What the hell happened with the last job? Did Takeo get away? Do I need to send a clean-up crew?”

“No. And if I needed a clean-up crew, I would have called it in beforehand.”

Wings, But No Hands

We continue on with the living situation with Mr. Takiyama, our normal day-to-day human resident, and his mystical creature roommate, Rei the Harpy. It’s that time of the year for Rei to being the usual changes for birds, but it seems more complicated than it should.

Normally, if she was around other harpies, it would be no issue because any problem they have would be solved in a matter of second. But since she’s with a human instead, things don’t turn out how they usually should.

And with feathers constantly falling off, Mr. Takiyama’s trying his best not to see certain things that he shouldn’t see.

“I don’t care what you say.”

“Does this mean it’s okay if I look at you while we’re talking right now?”

In case you forgot how things started, read their fated encounter in Winged Friend.

You’re Going Even If I Drag You

Time for another holiday family event. This time, ice cold beer and barbecuing will be the main event for today.

Surrounded by family and loved ones, it’s sure to be a fun time for all… except for the one person who didn’t want to even be there in the first place.

So many people can relate being dragged somewhere they don’t want to be…

“Yeah, and she told me she wasn’t going. Thus, I have no point in going.”

Burning Daylight

Nobody likes having to get up too early in the morning to do things; people like their sleeping time. Unfortunately, everybody will have those moments when they have to wake up earlier than usual to get something done.

But it’s even worse when you’re woken up early for something you never wanted to do nor had any interest in.

A Father and Son short drabble about one of the many “Rite of Passage” things to bring the sun into male adulthood.

Alex & Sam’s Daily Life – Lack of Sleep

Sleeping is one of life’s greatest luxuries. It’s both a way to help unwind after a stressful day and it takes you to a new realm of imagination. The only thing that can make it horrible is not being able to sleep.

Or being woken up extremely early in the morning for something trivial, preventing you from going back to sleep.

Sadly, that happens to Alexis after she agrees to do a favor for Samantha. Too bad she didn’t ask the right questions before agreeing. To make matters worse, she still has work in the morning.

Will Sam be able to stay awake from night to night, or will she crash and burn?

“What? Don’t tell me you’re a coffee hater?”

“I can’t stand it. I prefer tea over that black stuff. I’ve always been that way ever since I was a kid.”

“You sure we’re not somehow related? You’re more British than I am, and I’m from England.”

Bartender’s Thinking

People always go out to bars and clubs to have a good time with friends and loved ones. Lively music, lively people, and an exciting environment, the nightlife is one that draws people in for good times.

Sometimes, even the ones who have to provide the service for the bar can get swept up in the raging excitement. Alcohol flying off of the shelves, mistakes being made into regrets, the people of the night see it all.

And the person who gets to have the biggest influence in what happens at night are the bartenders. They’re the ones getting people drunk, after all.

A young man in a nice white button-up jacket with a black undershirt approaches the counter, “Jack on the Rocks, please.”

However, I do want to see if he’ll be able to hold it together under certain circumstances, mostly getting his ass handed to him.

Alex & Sam’s Daily Life – Cotton Candy Girl

Working in a big office building will eventually get tiresome; staring at a screen all day, making phone calls and having meetings so many times will eventually ware a person out. It’s even worse when you have to deal with irresponsible clientele.

Aside from dealing with clients, every now and they, co-workers help out newcomers of the group to make sure they fully understand how to do the job to the best of their ability.

Then there are co-workers who really focus on the job too much, mostly focusing on what to do for the weekend.

“Yup. You’ve got ass.”

I can see a gleam in Eliza’s eyes when she says, “I bet you two role-play a student-teacher relationship when you’re about to fu–”

“Stop right there!”

Kill la Kill: Season R – Chapter Three: Battle for Affection

Everybody’s starting to feel mixed emotions, causing a lack of sleep, confused thoughts, and doubt in themselves. Ryuko stays up at night, constantly thinking about the recent conversation with her older sister, Satsuki. For some reason, just thinking about it brings a sudden sense of embarrassment.

As for Jakuzure, she’s taken up a new activity to try and control the overwhelming emotions that dwell within. However, they seem to get the best of her and starts a spiral of actions that brings her a new rival.

How will these two be able to deal with their emotions when the main cause steps into play?

“Maybe you’re curious to see what she wants.”

I was here first. I was the one who was by your side ever since we were little. We grew up together, saw each other change, and now I’m put on the sideline all because some dead sister suddenly comes into your life?

Engraved Blackboard

I’ve finally reached my goal: The Black Void. I’ve traveled far and endured much, but I’m finally here. As much as I would like to avoid this incident, I sadly do now have a choice.

I must endure just a bit further before I can retire and retreat to my simple resting place.

I will make sure my engravings will not be in vain.

Armed with my white stick of power, I engrave sacred markings on it, moving as fast as I can. I can’t stand being in front of here.